You know how when things go wrong... when your 'bad day' turns into a 'bad week' then a 'bad month' and a 'bad year', through no fault of your own? When almost everything around you suddenly starts falling apart through circumstances you have virtually no control over? How do you deal with it?

Tell us more....we promise to cheer you up!

As you say, it's circumstances you have virtually no control over. Accept this fact and focus on what you can control.

Mars A Day! stop being so bloody sensible. What Fairly depressed clearly needs is to share his sad story in more detail, that we can cheer him up by taking the p*ss.....C'mon - can't be as bad as my mate a number of years ago. Got very drunk at a client reception and told some "old duffer" how easy it was being a consultant. Old duffer explained that he was in fact the client paying the bills. Mate went very white and made polite excuse to far corner of room. Bumped into very attractive women and started to chat her up, thinking that as he was at the very least going to be thrown of the project in the morning, he might as well attempt to score. He's trying all his best lines when who should arrive at hs shoulder but old duffer. Yes its his daughter come to meet him...Kept his job due to being very, very good at credit risk modelling but banished to "dungeon" at a project elsewhere.

If anyone deserves some p!ss taking it's the OP of thread 56104 for whom I have neither sympathy or common sense to provide.But yes ok, c'mon Fairly Depressed, tell us what is getting you down (and be prepared for some p!ss taking it seems...)

Well I can't go into too much detail as I know I have colleagues who read this forum, however here is a snapshot of some of the issues. I know they're not so big in the grand scheme of things, but everything around me is changing so quickly (for the worse) and I can't see any obvious way of stopping it, that it's now shaking my self confidence and starting to affect me emotionally.1. Unmanageable workload and expectations. Even with good time management and saying "no" and so on, I'm sinking. Missing deadlines, getting things wrong, that kind of thing. Mucking things up generally and people are now calling me on it bigtime. Despite trying to keep on top of things, as soon as I deal with one crisis, another two crises start afresh.2. Poor relationship with my managers. Basically they don't respect me.3. Personal dramas including a mad relative who is causing me all sorts of family grief.4. Huge sudden unexpected expenditure (house subsidence and boiler breakdown).5. Been advised that I'm now in a 'redundancy consultation process' at work. Wife not working, one kid to feed, another on the way.6. Zero savings despite frugal lifestyle as I'm not particularly senior and a junior analyst's salary doesn't go far in London these days.7. Car broken down.8. Have had 12 interviews for other jobs, rejected by all of them.

So basically you're just cr*p at your job, so you cannot deliver at work, your managers don't rate you, hence the redundancy, making little money as a consequence so spend all your free time entertaining yourself by shagging the wife (hey at least it's free right?) and drive a banger which you could have got rid of (I'm talking about your car at this point..) in the government scrappage scheme. O and lack the self respect to put your headache relative in their place and stop busting your balls.Given the lack of spine/talent above no one wants to hire you.Accurate?I think you need to question what you are doing - get out of MC and into something you will be good at; the money will then come.I can almost read the email now..Dear Rakesh Prabbi...

Thanks a lot.I'm not crap at what I do by the way - I can't be completely crap otherwise I wouldn't have even endured the past 2.25 years (with reasonably good ratings) at MBB. I've just ended up in a situation where things are falling apart rapidly and I can't see any way of sorting it out. :-(And before somebody questions it, my MBB salary IS rubbish. The guys downstairs who turn sketches into powerpoint slides earn more than I do. It's only once you're post-MBA that the earnings are half decent. I'm probably earning £5K/year more than somebody working for KPMG or the like - whoopee do, real financial security in a city where you can't even rent a 2 up 2 down for less than £1400/month.

Depressed? Then you need deep rest.Take a holiday, on a beach, or in the middle of nowhere with no phone, internet, etc. Things won't seem as bad when you come back, and all those vital deadlines will turn out not be so vital after all.

If you are MBB then you should have good options here. Your biggest problem seems to be your interview technique, so you need to straighten that out first and then hit the market. We all have personal dramas as bad as that, you just need to focus on your job situation as all those other dramas get much worse without a salary. 12 interviews and no success - you're either pitching up in totally the wrong area or have a lousy interview technique. What's the feedback? Can't you work on that?

Good to hear some fighting spirit Failry Depressed - I was hoping you would come back like that.I suspect you need to work on your interview technique, as Anon suggested; if you get 12 interviews your CV is working for you, but you are sabotaging yourself at 1st stage - you could look into getting some coaching (you could pay a coach, or a friendly HH might provide some coaching free). If you can take some time out that would help you get your head clear - you do sound like you cannot see 'the wood for the trees' at the moment, which is probably exaggerating your sense of helplessness in this situation.What area have you been targetting with your CV? Perhaps we can all pitch in with some useful advice on interview techniques etc.

Thanks everyone, and you're right - I think the issue with the offers situation is a combination of my interview technique and the fact that each job now seems to have around 10,000,000 applicants short-listed for it.Basically I'm one of those people who has the brains but is somewhat lacking in interview skills, personality, charisma, likeability... call it what you will. I don't make a good first impression. I don't really know why. I'm an introvert and get on better with computers than people. People sometimes act surprised or jealous when they find out that I, an apparently dweeby little idiot with no social skills, have the track record that I do (straight A's, MBB, that kind of thing). I suppose also I'm lacking in self-esteem and as Mars correctly puts it, am feeling sort of helpless at the moment, which, let's be honest, nobody wants in a future employee. I've been going for a range of different positions, mostly around general business analysis for large companies. Deep rest and a change of attitude is probably the solution, but knowing how to do the latter (and really make it real) is difficult. Tips for interview technique given this situation would also be appreciated.

Hi FD (do you mind if I call you FD for short?)Here I am looking forward to some lazy Friday p-taking and you ruin it by coming across as a nice guy who needs a bit of sympathy and real advice. Jeez!First, you need to recognise that there are actually fewer things going wrong than you think. Number 1, 2 5 and 6 are actually the same thing, but because you are a bit down, you're seeing them as "one more thing on top of another". Your lack of respect, salary, management support, ridiculous workload and being picked for consultation all go together. You cannot fix them one at a time - but one thing will fix them all. That one things is as you know yourself is a new job. The important thing is to stop thinking you have dozens of problems when in fact you have just one. The second thing is to look at your kids (albeit in bump form), which I'm sure you do, and realise that you have a true blessing in them. Jobs are just something we all do to until we no longer have to.Thirdly, the car the subsidence and the boiler. Yup, had the lot. Pain the ar*e isn't it. But the car I had to leave for the US cops to take to the crusher cos I couldn't afford the tow? It was 15 years ago and I can hardly remember the colour of it. The two weeks in the dead of winter trying to fill a bath with a kettle (a lesson in optimism), well that didn't kill me either. The dodgy house that I had to sell - well lets just say that’s all in the past now too.What you are going through at work is very, very common. Clever guys who are nice, but a bit introverted are cannon fodder for BBH partners who are clever, but not nice and not introverted. They need a steady supply of you guys to bill on their projects and work themselves to death. BUT, it will never be worth it for you, because you will never get to join their club. You already have everything they can give you - their name on your CV and a few years of intensive experience. I suggest that you take whetever you use for a diary and write the words "SELF AWARE" on todays date. From this day forward do not kid yourself one iota that your future is not elsewhere and put all your effort in to achieving that one thing.I had a good friend who went through this some year ago at at major strat firm (one of the best). He excelled in his first few years, but hit a wall and started to burn out. The downward spin was inescapable and the firm, seeing the trouble he was having, acted like the heartless bast**ds they are and heaped more pressure on him. One day he just walked into the partner and said, "I can't cope, it's not for me, etc.". Immediately their attitude changed and they started setting him up with interviews with clients and being very supportive. IMPORTANT POINT. Most BBH firms want a happy supportive allumni who will speak well of them (even if the last few months were dire) and (HERES THE IMPORTANT BIT AGAIN), encourage their new employers to use their old firm. They DO NOT want a series of junior analysts out in client world telling tales of bullying, made up case studies and "money for old rope" attitudes.It might be worth discussing this option with any friendly mentor (or HR if need be)?My other question is - are you applying to other consultancies? My advice would be not to do so - you will simply have the same experience and I would also expect most consultancies to "sniff out" whay you are leaving and be put off. I would suggest a move to industry where you might find clever but introverted people do not get shouted down by braying donkeys, to quite the same extent.Let us all know when you get that new job and if my advice helps you can name the new baby after me. MR COOL, its got a ring to it!

With the exception of naming your baby Mr Cool I agree with everything he says (personally I think calling your child Mars A Day would be better but that's just my opinion).

...if it's a girl I accept that Mr Cool would sound stupid and would accept instead that you name her after my dear mother, Little Miss Middle Class....

Sorry Mars A Day, it been done already.......is this how you find your candidates?http://www.arthurfindlaycollege.org/tutors/day.htm

Taken straight from your blog Mr Cool?

Damn, busted!

"My suggestion to you is to drink heavily."Animal House...

I'm happy to throw a little ray of sunshine into FD's life by renting him my 2 up, 2 down with change from £1400 a month...

Fairly Depressed - how have things worked out. In retrospect you weren't Nick Clegg in disguise ?Hope not - as you're probably worse off now !

"1. Unmanageable workload and expectations. Even with good time management and saying "no" and so on, I'm sinking. Missing deadlines, getting things wrong, that kind of thing. Mucking things up generally and people are now calling me on it bigtime. Despite trying to keep on top of things, as soon as I deal with one crisis, another two crises start afresh."Answer - Fain a long term illness, my boss did this last year, still got paid and all his problems went away."2. Poor relationship with my managers. Basically they don't respect me. "Answer - Demand respect by leaving a horses head in their childrens bed"3. Personal dramas including a mad relative who is causing me all sorts of family grief."Answer - Same as number 2."4. Huge sudden unexpected expenditure (house subsidence and boiler breakdown). "Answer - www.wonga.com"5. Been advised that I'm now in a 'redundancy consultation process' at work. Wife not working, one kid to feed, another on the way."Answer - stop spawning more offspring until you are in a position to support them properly. Tell you wife to get off her backside and get a job."6. Zero savings despite frugal lifestyle as I'm not particularly senior and a junior analyst's salary doesn't go far in London these days."Answer - Sell an organ. "7. Car broken down."Answer - If you live in London, why do you need a car? Get the bus."8. Have had 12 interviews for other jobs, rejected by all of them."Answer - Join the army, i hear they are looking for people. Otherwise get better at interviews, or go for jobs you have a more realistic chance of landing.

This weekend, just sit back, crack open a beer, and watch the entire box set of Rocky. Then hopefully try growing a pair. You think Rocky would write this sort of tripe on an internet forum, or would he be busting 50 one handed press ups with a sack of cement on his back?

Fantastic concept - going through life and every time you meet a problem ask yourself "what woud Rocky do?"I'd like to watch...from a distance.