Facts:-Early 30's-Got some brains ( and have good qualifications- masters degree with distinction)-Earning over 100k USD annually-Good company ( steady and stable)-Good Boss and team-Good project and job duties -Easy hours ( 9:30 start, take a couple of coffee breaks, 1.5 hrs lunch, gape at some girls at cafeteria, a couple more coffee breaks, and then knock off at 5:30)-20 min river cruise between work and residence -Own well performing assets ( real estate)-Have a good looking girl ( who also has a good job, company etc)-Good friends and social circlebut.... i feel frustrated and unispired. This has lasted for almost a year. Is it time to chuck it all in and start fresh? i dont know what i want to do, im confused and i feel lost. Should i seek career counselling/mentoring? There seems to be a definate lack of direction and goals in my career.I feel like i am just drifting rudderless, smoking and drinking ( at every possible opportunity) and those substances are numbing the pain of what i should be cherishing or doing ( which i am not). All i know is that i could be a thousand times more than what i am now, but i am not and this is also causing some frustration. [ I am not depressed....just unispired with lots of things especially work.]Serious responses only please. I realise may post may sound like a joke, but its not.

You need a hobby.

Don't worry. Given your smoking and drinking habit, it's probably just a mid-life crisis.

My guess is either:1. you have figuratively bought everything you want and have discovered a loss of personal meaning/worth due to a loss of opportunities to acquireOr2. you have status anxietyYou need an aim which is neither work not acquisitions related, i.e. conveys no status but conveys achievement - try a triathlon or something like that.

hey, sounds like me, i took up martial arts to get a sense of achievement

I guess there are two options - make the remainder of your 30s wilder or more settled. I don't need to spell out the former but the latter would involve getting married, buying a place, doing it up, starting a family, negotiating when the PS3 can get an airing ...etc...!

I believe you because I have been exactly where you are.But trust me on this, its in YOU. You won't be happy with what you get until you love what have. You won't like what you become until you love what you ARE.In my humble view, you need get involved with some kind of meditation/contemplation which can come in many forms.I am over forty and joined a boxing club, which was a bit odd given that I hadnt had any kind of punch up in my life and I am settled suburban family man. Tust me, no room for bullsh*t there. I would say I am a much calmer, happier man since taking it up.Who mentioned triathalon? Great shout.

yeah been there mate. Took up some hobbies I had previously back in uni (half marathon running, stage acting - don't laugh you vvankers) and felt much better. Also started traveling more outside of work and spent one Saturday a month helping at a charity. It's a healthy thing to keep wanting more but unhealthy to expect work to provide it all. At some point you have to look elsewhere for fulfillment.

Man know this feeling... feel like I have been like this for past couple of years, almost exactly the same in that all visibly is very good but feel lost and unfulfilled. Also 30yrs old.I did get in to 10ks, 1/2 marathons, and recently Sailing ... the sailing was great but still find myself wondering if I should pack in the job and do something else ... just feel like I need to do something drastic. Looking at motorcycles again but have a feeling will be good briefly and then be back to where I was again.Frustrating, just keep going. Maybe 30 is the new mid life crisis stage ;)

i hear you! I am 31 and this is my life

I was in a similar situation 2 years back. A friend told me to start meditation...it has worked wonders...I am like an 18 year old...though I am 39 yrs old :-) try it for 21 days , simple breathing or lying on your back and just focus on your breathing and let it slow down, 10 min/day more than sufficient....

Not an answer, but hopefully this will help you feel that you are not alone….Early mid-life crisis is now quite well accepted as a symptom of modern life and has been the subject of a number of studyies. Only two generations ago the majority of people progressed their career at a pretty slowish pace. Seniority was related to age and it was normal to be in your early fifties before running out of steam or realising how fundamentally unimportant the work that most of us do actually is! Now career progression is much faster and layers of management have been flattened by improvements in electronic communication and reduced formality. As a result many people arrive at the futility realisation much earlier in their life.People who come to this conclusion when they are mid-fifties can hang on in there until retirement, but in your thirties it’s a different prospect. Personally I took some serious time out, lived abroad, had kids and then returned to corporate life in a different guise (I work freelance) and with none of the baggage I used to have.I still don't know the answers, but nowadays that doesn't worry me...

.....just take a holiday for a month.. but go to a so called 'third world' country suggest sub saharan Africa..... Live life there for a moment, embrace the culture and the discomfort in life and notice how the average locals (for there are stupendously wealthy people there as in the west) embrace their living - and all that is difficient in it - and still have enthusiasm that frankly when I interview some job hunters for I wonder if they ever get excited on anything nowadays.running, boxing kayaking well..to each their own.. just expand your horizon geographically but forget going to those 'touristy' vacation spots..we've all been there.. use the net and explore the world and when you come back write a little blog or note about it.HINT: Outside of work just stop doing routine stuff cause I don't give a damn what job you do and how much you're paid it's just routine and extra 000's respectively.. it's what you do outside of what get's you the 000's that makes life worth living.

Great thread! I think a lot of people are at this stage (well this thread is proof). I am 30, just took on a job where I don't need to worry about my finances ever again (assuming I keep the job) and the where the work life balance is fairly ok ....but not sure what the next step should be. It is pretty unmotivating to wonder about that and come to the conclusion that staying at the same place might be the best, but most boring, solution.

I'm in the same boat as YOU ! Everyone is losing their jobs and I just got promoted with a higher salary (you would think i'd be happy but the extra salary means resigning becomes so much harder) I've even picked my new careers venture just haven't the b*lls to resigned. Stay put in your job until you know what other careers you would considerLook at www.careershifters.org - this might help.

The simple truth is, you have spent the best years of your life in pursuit of what you have now attained. You chose your uni, your masters degree, the things you do and say, the way you think and the things you value, just so you could earn more, gain more status, gain 'assets' and consider yourselves 'wealthy'. Now you're there, however, you've forgotten why you wanted it in the first place. All you actually have is a house or two and plenty expendable cash. So what next? Earn more? Invest? Switch careers? For what? So you can distract yourself from the truth for a few more years? Take up a hobby to numb the cold realisation that you have no purpose? Go ahead, run a marathon, punch the hell out of someone, meditate until your troubles float away. And then what? You're back where you started. The only way to really alleviate this issue is to start gaining real pleasure from your existence. Enjoy the small things. Learn to appreciate how fortunate you have been. Give something back. Children do help a great deal in this pursuit, they can give you a truly beautiful perspective on the raw simplicity of life. Leave your little bubble. You don't need to go to sub-saharan Africa. Every major city on the planet has poverty and deprivation running in its veins. Go and see it. Try and imagine what that is like. Try and imagine how your humanity would be affected if you were stripped down and left with nothing. Picture yourself in that doorway. Would you still be the strong, confident, outgoing person you are now with all your things around you? If the answer is no, ask why not. Your humanity is not defined by your belongings, so start looking for the things that DO define it. Generosity, integrity, truth, self knowledge. I am of immigrant parents and grew up in a deprived area of East London where my father worked 6 days a week for 40 years to end up in suburban bungalow and give his two kids a chance at improving on his own situation. While he worked days my mother worked nights, and neither myself nor my younger sibling spent a day in childcare. Throughout it all, their goal was not to own things, not to gain 'assets' but to ensure that they could hold their heads up and say 'I did it'. My fathers integrity, honesty and love of life was not based on what he had earned, but the freedom of mind it allowed him. He was an un-educated immigrant who entered a foreign country with about 10 words of English and £2 in his pocket. I was with him in hospital tonight and he still doesn't complain. He has no need to. He lived his life well. He worked hard. He wasn't perfect, but everything he did was for the good of his family and the betterment of those around him. He put 3 of his nephews through college. He built a house for his sister back home. He made sure his wife would be looked after when he was gone. And he NEVER had a hobby.Make of that what you will. For me, it means that you need to take some time to work out what really matters. Then invest time in it. Everything else is just a distraction. Be grateful for the privileged, indulgent lives you lead, and do something meaningful with your wealth.

Now enough of all the philosophical bollox, get back to work you lazy bunch of whiners!

thanks everyone for your advice.

But trust me on the boxing.Anyone want a fight?

Fight club?

I started weight training and running stupid distances to address my early 40's crisis and I feel absolutely great! Whilst not hugely ambitious on thew work front I have rediscovered a greater drive in life and for achievement, even if not all concentrated on my career. (Body's in great shape too!)

Yoga, Pranayam (controlled breathing) and Meditation is the answer.Peace and Happiness are natural to us and we don’t have to buy /find them in outside world. If it’s about proving your ability to conquer the world, then story of Alexander in India is quite famous...

BTW, I came to find peace in the world and my relationship to it when I became a Roman Catholic some years back.